[Scion] A Path Not Taken

Sales, Scion

Hey, buckaroos. As part of our tradition of openness, we’re giving you a look behind the scenes at how a game comes together. Early in the production process, Scion 2nd Edition was going in a very different direction, a direction which had to be scrapped at the last minute and at great expense. A sample of some of the tie-in fiction from that early incarnation of Scion 2nd Edition, Frost Giant Butt Warriors, has been placed on DriveThru for your reading, uh, pleasure. Although we’ve found no author name attached to this, we fired Neall just in case.

Eric Donner just can’t seem to catch a break. Once a monster hunter at the top of his game, a string of bad luck has sent Eric scrounging around Asgard. Things go from bad to worse when Ice Giants invade the realm of the gods, a new breed of warrior that specializes in hot, gay, anal poundings the Æsir fear. Little do they know Eric is no stranger to this kind of combat….

Note that this is labeled as an Adult item, so you’ll need to have your account set to view Adult items in your account options.

  39 comments for “[Scion] A Path Not Taken

  1. bydawine
    April 1, 2017 at 10:19 am

    I don’t get how this is funny.

  2. Lou Silvers
    April 1, 2017 at 10:29 am

    Uhhh huh. More like dudes of legend please?I’m sure I’m gonna get flamed and trashed here but this makes me uncomfortable, because later on there is gonna be some brujah attacking people for having an opinion that differs from their own. Kinda seems like this is a no win? You’re gonna have a group of folks on both sides of the fence that this upsets, and that’s the funny thing about inclusivity and the political correctness it always seems like it’s at the expense of someone else. On top of that after all the years of folks being upset about fishmalks, or “beautiful madness” being a tag line for a game, or just the release of cwod gypsies. Yes I understand this is an April fool’s joke, ask people in a month or two that missed the memo if they knew. I dunno this just seems like a bad call. For me it’s very simple, don’t download. Call me homophobic if you like, it’s mostly cause I’m bigoted towards the Aesir. It doesn’t seem like “if ya don’t like it change the channel” is a thing anymore.. But and hopefully I’m wrong, I see this being another reason I come across an article lecturing folks about inculisivity and sensitivity in gaming and frankly those have become tiresome. I was hoping to come here and be amused by “shadows of portland” or “dark eras: fumbled election” now I’m just waiting for the fallout. But these are just the thoughts of a straight white guy, and I understand just how much that invalidates my feelings or opinions.

    • Myradmir
      April 1, 2017 at 10:32 am

      Note the Date.

    • Joseph Carriker
      April 1, 2017 at 11:38 am

      Don’t worry, devilman. This is a true way that proves love.

  3. Leliel
    April 1, 2017 at 10:37 am

    Paging Mr. Tingle.

    You an OP fan? Because, well, this sounds like you, oh lord of love.

    • Victor J Kinzer
      April 1, 2017 at 12:10 pm

      I love Mr. Tingle and this is fantastic.

  4. Phil H
    April 1, 2017 at 10:40 am

    Yeah, sorry… aren’t we past the stage of “is funny cos it’s gay”. This is the sort of level I’d expect from a bad Adam Sandler ‘comedy’.
    I’m actually pretty disappointed in Onyx Path here.

    • Impernious
      April 1, 2017 at 10:51 am

      It’s funny because it’s an homage to Mr. Chuck Tingle…

      http://www.chucktingle.com/

    • Zeea
      April 1, 2017 at 10:57 am

      It’s a Chuck Tingle reference. He writes ridiculous comedy porn and has a certain way of talking (which is what the “buckaroo” reference is). That’s why it’s supposed to be funny. Not because it’s gay. I’m not saying it’s invalid for LGBT folks to have a problem with Chuck Tingle stuff–I don’t, but I’m a trans lesbian and not a gay man–but I’m just explaining the origin there.

      • Phil H
        April 1, 2017 at 11:07 am

        That might be the intention, but essentially it comes down to the whole “joke” being that a fictional character takes it up the butt. I’m not saying anyone needs to feel offended, but frankly I just don’t find that funny. Anyhow, I’ve said my piece and made it the first ever item I’ve deleted from my Drivethru library, so I’m out. Other people can enjoy or not enjoy it as they prefer.

        • Juan
          April 1, 2017 at 11:18 am

          It only comes down to that if you don’t get the reference. That’s what happens when jokes are based on a reference that not everybody gets, they mistake it.

        • Victor J Kinzer
          April 1, 2017 at 12:11 pm

          Well I’ll just say as a gay man I find it HILARIOUS! Chuck Tingle is my hero, especially after this last year’s puppies debacle.

          • Joseph D Carriker
            April 1, 2017 at 1:23 pm

            Victor J Kenzer: it’s good to see other buckaroos proving love is real.

  5. Shan
    April 1, 2017 at 10:50 am

    While not trying to downplay the probably very real frustration with regard to this? I have a feeling we’re in Chuck Tingle territory here. I obviously don’t speak for OPP, but it seems like that’s what this was designed as.

    Now if you hate chuck tingle, or don’t appreciate that style of humor? that’s perfectly legit, and you have a right to have your voice heard here, but I think this was harmless, if tasteless fun.

    • Zeea
      April 1, 2017 at 11:02 am

      It’s definitely a Chuck Tingle reference. That’s why they mentioned “buckaroos”, the way he refers to his fans.

    • Roguewind
      April 3, 2017 at 2:54 pm

      “Now if you hate chuck tingle, or don’t appreciate that style of humor?”

      You missed out, “or never heard of”. I was disappointed when I saw this was the April Fool’s joke. I was hoping for something that everyone would find funny, and not something that appears aimed at a portion of the community.

      I was even more disappointed at OffensivelyFestive comment of “Maybe we need a safe space for our non-LGBT friends…” because what we need, is to make people feel like they need safe spaces. You know, like society did to the LGBT community (and others) in the not so distant past, and in some places even today.

  6. Frank
    April 1, 2017 at 10:56 am

    Its April fools people, calm down.

  7. Atavist
    April 1, 2017 at 12:47 pm

    F’ing hilarious.

  8. OffensivelyFestive
    April 1, 2017 at 1:14 pm

    This is flippin’ hilarious!

    Also, lol @ the reactions to this. Maybe we need a safe space for our non-LGBT friends…

  9. Zen_Hydra
    April 1, 2017 at 1:36 pm

    Are there stats for void crabs?

  10. Yossarian
    April 1, 2017 at 6:35 pm

    All work and no play make Neall something something fired

  11. Wandering
    April 1, 2017 at 8:42 pm

    I’m not likely to ever read this, or any of Chuck Tingle’s books, but…

    I first heard about Dr. Tingle because of the Sad Puppies Hugo Awards thing, and his reaction to being dragged into that, and everything I’ve seen from him since has convinced me that he is a real hero who is making the world a better place for all of us to live in.

    I wholeheartedly approve of OP giving him a salute like this!

  12. Crash
    April 1, 2017 at 10:15 pm

    I get that it’s supposed to be a joke and a send up to Tingle but I’m not a fan. It feels more like a “hehe gay stuff is funny” joke and misses the mark.

    • Scelesta
      April 2, 2017 at 12:40 am

      To be fair would it have been considered funny had the main man been a women? If so why is straight stuff funny and gay not?

      Anything can be a joke, people need to grow thicker skin and learn not everything needs to cater towards one group or another.

      Its perfectly okay to say “i dont like this” and move on, or hell not even read it. (The title after all is pretty obvious as to what it contains. )
      and its just as okay to laugh your ass off if you do find it funny.

      • Crash
        April 2, 2017 at 1:43 am

        I don’t think it would have been any funnier if they had done it as some kind of Fabio style book cover either.

        Of course far be it for me to say that others can’t enjoy it or find it humorous. It was clearly a joke and I’m not saying people shouldn’t tell jokes or that you can’t laugh, I’m just expressing my dislike of the joke.

  13. Scelesta
    April 1, 2017 at 11:58 pm

    Well this just made my evening. I pissed myself with much needed laughter.
    Then disturbed myself by wishing there was more to read!

  14. Drakenhof
    April 2, 2017 at 8:12 am

    Lol some reactions. Onyx Path include homosexual, asexual, transexual and even non-binary characters in their fictions, showing a great sensibility towards minorities. But now they are homophobes because they made an April Fool’s day joke wiht gay frost giants. Grow a thicker skin, please.

    • Etch
      April 2, 2017 at 9:04 am

      I don’t think anyone has said they think OPP are made of homophobes. Their’s some people talking about how this makes them feel uncomfortable because they probably don’t know the chuck tingle connection so they think the joke is “haha gay sex is funny” and theirs this self described straight white dude posting passive aggressive about how tiring he feels including minorities is.

      I’m kind of surprised you didn’t tell him to get a thicker skin.

      That being said, the reference certainly got a chuckle out of me if your still reading these rich.

    • Phil H
      April 2, 2017 at 10:21 am

      No-one called them homophobes. I doubt anyone would even remotely attempt to suggest that was the case. Even as one of the first people to criticise this above I only said I was disappointed. That disappointment comes from the fact that Onyx Path has always worked to be sensitive and in this case I think they missed a mark. There’s a massive difference between saying “guys, I feel like this stepped over a line” and starting a lynch mob over perceived homophobia.
      Also, you and a few other people need to get over telling people to grow a thicker skin. I, like many others have been subject to very real actual homophobia which is waved off by the source as a joke. If people are uncomfortable about this then it’s because, unintentionally or not, they’ve been made to feel uncomfortable.

      • Unsilent Majority
        April 2, 2017 at 2:48 pm

        No, we don’t. Like others have said, if you don’t like it, then move on.

        No one is going to stop telling you to “grow thicker skin.” Either you find it funny, or you don’t.

        If you do(like I do), then great. If you don’t, then that’s fine too.

        • Phil h
          April 2, 2017 at 3:13 pm

          not keen on pulling the whole victim thing, but that right there… that’s bullying 101.
          “I find this funny and if you don’t you’re either the problem or need to move on”. Move on, not be here, not be part of this club. That’s actually the exact language I was calling out.
          I don’t believe for a second that anyone at Onyx Path is a homophobe, but I think you personally need to consider your ideas on how to interact with other people.

          • Unsilent Majority
            April 2, 2017 at 7:46 pm

            If what you got from my statement(and others before me) was “bullying,” then no further interaction between us is necessary.

            Enjoy your day.

          • Drakenhof
            April 3, 2017 at 3:19 pm

            What a drama…

  15. Hyacinthe
    April 2, 2017 at 10:39 am

    It needed more illustrations 😉

    Funny ^^

  16. Omegaphallic
    April 2, 2017 at 8:12 pm

    It’s not funny because it’s gay, it’s funny because it playfully parodies internet erotic fan fiction well, without being judgemental, which as some who has written some really twisted erotic, I know something about.

  17. Vyvian
    April 3, 2017 at 2:57 am

    Yeah, I didn’t get the Tingle thing at first either, but am now mostly into the joke. The comment thread is a little too intense. I think we can agree that homophobia is real and if we’re reading and commenting on Onyx Path’s site we don’t think they’re working too closely in concert with the kyriarchical forces of oppression. Once an upset fan gets that this is a specific reference it makes more sense and only feels a little cringey.

    But you know if there actually WAS some kind of homophobic or anti-sodomite sentiment I think it would be a good way to give back to the community by giving us more LGBT content (condition: U Haul Syndrome, rules for homemade HRT with goblin fruit, a flowchart for a polyamorous sabbat punk house), or maybe just more Changeling stuff. Not because of the “fairies lol” but because I personally am most excited about Changeling.

    Actually even if it was all in perfectly good fun I think I deserve to be compensated and I am also happy to see several people flogged. I will begin working on a list, but volunteers are welcome.

    Anyway that’s my two cents.

    • Victor J Kinzer
      April 3, 2017 at 9:28 am

      Not going to lie though Changeling is super duper LGBTeriffic. As in no really it’s actually an amazing metaphor for invisible communities, constant code switching (talking in vocabulary that only a portion of the people around you understand), self rejection of identity, and the rejection of your identity by those around you, and the family estrangement dynamics LGBT people experience. The irony is I don’t think any of that was done on purpose because “tee hee faeries” but it just sort of worked out that way.

      • Vyvian
        April 4, 2017 at 3:21 am

        Oh, I am well aware. It’s definitely one of the reasons why its my favorite setting. I can’t help but think that there were a few people with queer sensibilities contributing to its creation. Altho maybe thats wishful thinking. In any case its p relatable and delciously fertile ground for story telling. But yea ONYX PATH I AM VERY UPSET ABOUT THIS TINGLE THING GIVE ME MORE QUEER THINGS THANK YOU.

  18. aantia
    April 3, 2017 at 6:18 pm

    Rather than a gay joke, wouldn’t it be more of a Norse joke? Because of how famously and inconsistently homophobic they were?
    Also, I wasn’t aware of Chuck Tingle prior to reading the comments here and just figured it was a parody of totally generic erotic m/m paranormal ‘romance’. Which is a very large genre.

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